Fix a Heart
by snarkysweetness
Summary: Season Two AU: Two and a half years after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Coulson and his team are still struggling to rise from the ashes, slowly piecing their lives and organization back together one shard at a time. With nowhere else to turn and the life of one of their own on the line they're left with no choice but to break Ward out of prison and [continues within]
1. (Skye) I Tried to Sever Ties

**Title: **Fix a Heart  
><strong>Chapter 01:<strong> (Skye) I Tried to Sever Ties  
><strong>Author:<strong> snarkysweetness  
><strong>Rating:<strong> R  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Skye, Grant, Melinda, Phil, Jemma, Fitz, Trip, Lance Hunter, Isabelle Hartley, Billy & Sam Koenig, Bobbi Morse, Clint, Natasha, Raina, Kate Bishop, Skye's father, Alice Linn, Maria, Tony, Bruce, Steve, May's mom & sister, Talbot, & others that may pop in from time to time  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Skyeward, Fitzsimmons, Philinda, Triplett/Hunter, & Clintasha with past Isabelle/Victoria, Clint/Bobbi, & May/her ex-husband  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Season Two AU: Two and a half years after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Coulson and his team are still struggling to rise from the ashes, slowly piecing their lives and organization back together one shard at a time. With nowhere else to turn and the life of one of their own on the line they're left with no choice but to break Ward out of prison and bring him along for the ride. Filled with angst, betrayal, romance, and snark! Come along for the whimsical ride down what will never happen in season two.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Heavy-handed on the angst, mentions to Bahrain and China, sexual situations, cursing, mild-violence, & oh yes did I mention there's angst?  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I own nothing.  
><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> So I kind of wanted to do something like this awhile back and then the promo happened and I became consumed with this. I'm trying a different storytelling style that I hope works. This has been really painful to write so far and I was planning to post it all at once but I realized not only would that been way too many words to post at once but way too much pain as well. I'm planning to post chapters in chunks as I feel they go together best and I'm hoping this will be finished by the time the second season actually airs. Anyway, enjoy and try not to hate me too much because the show will probably hurt more?

The heels of her boots echoed through the dim hallway as she followed the guard to an interrogation room. Just being here gave her the creeps and in the past two and a half year she'd been in her share of hellholes so for her to find this place unsettling…

Well, she wasn't going to think about that. She was here for a reason and so was he; he deserved to be here. She refused to feel sorry for him just because prison was just as terrible as she'd imagined it would be (and she had imagined it plenty).

"He'll be right through here, Agent May," the guard instructed as he led her through into the darkest, dingiest interrogation room she'd ever seen (and she thought The Playground was bad). Skye gave him a short nod as he disappeared and let out a small sigh of relief when he was gone.

She resisted the urge to toy with her new bangs (God, she hated them) and inspected a spot on the wall. There was nothing special about it; she just wanted to avoid having to look at him for as long as possible. Not to mention she wanted to avoid contact with the guards as much as she could. She knew that with her make-over(though the resemblance was already remarkable), her hacking skills, and help from May she'd get away with impersonating May's younger, CIA-operative sister, but it didn't stop her from fearing she'd be caught.

Skye was putting everything on the line by being here and she was not going to allow Grant Ward to destroy her life again.

Her skin went cold as a pair of footsteps sounded through the tiny room. A metal chair scraped across the concrete floor and she could hear him being shoved into it.

"Five minutes."

She nodded and kept her gaze ahead, feeling sicker to her stomach than she'd ever felt in her life (which was saying something).

Skye could feel his eyes on her as the lights flickered. Neither said a word. She knew he had to have something to say, he'd requested to see her so many times she'd lost count but she'd never come, not until now, not until she needed him.

The chair moved again but she didn't flinch. There was a gun tucked securely in its holster and he'd be dead on the ground before he could touch her. She wasn't the same terrified little girl he'd met all those years ago; she not only had what it took to pull the trigger but she would not hesitate.

"Sk…Skye?" He whispered in a hollow voice. "Is…" His voice broke. "Sweetheart? Is that you? You're really here?" He was close to tears and she hated that after all this time, after everything he'd done, that even though she hated him with every fiber of her being she felt a familiar pull to him.

She slowly turned her head but didn't look at him. "Shh, it's me," she whispered as she slipped her 'badge' out of her pocket and pressed a button. The lights flickered again and then the room went half-dark. She wasn't sure if they bothered to keep surveillance equipment in here but now it didn't matter; at least for the next three minutes.

She gathered the courage to spare him a glance, just once glance, she just had to see him, once, just to _know_ but when she did she realized how close he'd gotten (she cursed herself for allowing him to surprise her, she was better than this) and she quickly stumbled back, wanting to be as far from him as possible. This of course meant she had to see him, all of him, and take in how…

Every single part of her went cold. Were they even feeding him? And when was the last time he'd met a razor?

Ward's expression shifted from worry to hurt and she grew angry. He had no right to feel anything, he was the one who had broken everything, broken them; this was all _his_ fault.

"Sk-Skye?"

"I need your help," she whispered, hating that she was here, that she'd allowed Coulson to talk her into this, but…

Well, this wasn't about her anymore.

He nodded like a faithful puppy and oh was there somewhere she wanted to kick him.

"You said once…you'd found things out about me? And when Coulson…he said it was about my parents and that you would only tell me?" Leave it to him to try to manipulate a visit out of her. The day they'd shipped him off to a real prison had been one of the best days of her life (how those all seemed to involve him she would never understand).

"Skye, I'm-"

"I don't care. There are only three things I want to know: everything about my parents, if you still have contacts within Hydra, and if you're committed to proving you can change."

Coulson was big on the forgiveness and redemption and while Skye didn't agree that Ward deserved it nor that he could pull it off she owed Coulson everything so she would let this one slide; for now.

He nodded obediently and she moved to the door.

"Tomorrow, noon; I'd recommend staying away from the outer wall of your cell, unless you want to get blown up, in which case, be my guest," she instructed as she turned the knob.

"What-wait! I need to tell you-"

"There's no time, tomorrow," she muttered knowing the electronic blackout had worn off.

"Skye!" Now his voice was strong and she'd be lying if she said it didn't break her heart to hear how desperate he sounded.

"No," she hissed, close to tears and having no desire to hear anything he had to say.

"Skye, I still-"

The door slammed behind her before she could hear his confession.


	2. (Skye) I Ended Up with Wounds to Bind

**Title: **Fix a Heart  
><strong>Chapter 02:<strong> (Skye) I Ended Up with Wounds to Bind  
><strong>Author:<strong> snarkysweetness  
><strong>Rating:<strong> R  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Skye, Grant, Melinda, Phil, Jemma, Fitz, Trip, Lance Hunter, Isabelle Hartley, Billy & Sam Koenig, Bobbi Morse, Clint, Natasha, Raina, Kate Bishop, Skye's father, Alice Linn, Maria, Tony, Bruce, Steve, May's mom & sister, Talbot, & others that may pop in from time to time  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Skyeward, Fitzsimmons, Philinda, Triplett/Hunter, & Clintasha with past Isabelle/Victoria, Clint/Bobbi, & May/her ex-husband  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Season Two AU: Two and a half years after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Coulson and his team are still struggling to rise from the ashes, slowly piecing their lives and organization back together one shard at a time. With nowhere else to turn and the life of one of their own on the line they're left with no choice but to break Ward out of prison and bring him along for the ride. Filled with angst, betrayal, romance, and snark! Come along for the whimsical ride down what will never happen in season two.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Heavy-handed on the angst, mentions to Bahrain and China, sexual situations, cursing, mild-violence, & oh yes did I mention there's angst?  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I own nothing.  
><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> So when Fury makes Phil director he tells him to 'take him time and do it right' which is why the big time jump. I don't think they could get anywhere in a few months even with Tony's help while also staying off the grid and I think Grant needs time in prison so yeah, that's where we are.

_**Two and a half years ago (May 2014) … **_

Skye did her best to ignore the knocking on her door but Coulson was persistent.

"Leave me alone," she grumbled miserably.

"I could, but I know a young lady whose favorite ice cream is Americone Dream and would be awfully angry with me if Trip ate it-"

Skye flung her bedroom door open with a gasp. "You didn't? How?" She asked, her eyes lighting up for the first time in two weeks. Coulson held out the pint and a spoon with a smile and she gave him a quick hug before taking them happily. She rushed back to her bed and jumped in happily digging into the ice cream.

Ice cream was one of the few things she'd indulged in back in her van days and she needed the comfort right now. She needed something that felt like home. Plus, she'd been so stressed everything she ate went right into the toilet and man was she starving.

Coulson lingered in the doorway. "May I?"

She nodded as she shoved a huge spoonful into her mouth. Coulson entered and closed the door behind him. Skye made a face as she realized she'd eaten too quickly and now her brain was so cold it was on fire.

"Skye," Coulson said with a sigh and she gave him a pout.

"Not now," she said through a mouthful, eagerly going for more as he sat on the edge of her bed. "How did you guys get real food?"

"Manners," he scolded. She rolled her eyes. It was a little too late for that. "We've gotten hold of other agents, some are on their way, they're willing to stick this through with us, and others are-"

"Stark?"

He nodded. "He's been very generous in offering us help. Agent Hill thought a grocery run would be beneficial so she sent Agent Hunter along with a van-full."

Skye snorted. What the hell kind of name was 'Hunter'?

He gave her a 'look'.

"Right, boss, sorry," she muttered, thankful to have something that wasn't non-perishable. A steak would be amazing right now, come to think of it, and she wasn't even a fan. She was so used to eating things from diners, that held up in her van, and that were bus-friendly that real food was a mystery to her. But man did she want just…everything. She wanted everything.

And she was not eating her feelings, nope, she just needed it. May had been training her twice as hard as-

She scowled and suddenly her ice cream wasn't as appealing as it had been a minute ago and she felt ready to throw it back up.

"Look, Skye, about Ward-"

"No," she whispered angrily. Of course the one happy thing to happen to her since her life had been ripped away from her yet again came with conditions. Why did Grant Ward have to taint every part of her life?

"I'm sorry, Skye, but he refuses to talk, he'll only do it-"

"_No_."

"I know he…" Coulson tried to pat her hand but she drew it away angrily. He sighed. "Skye, I'm sorry, but we need to get as much information out of him as we can-"

"I'm not hungry anymore," she muttered, shoving his bribe into his arms.

"Skye-"

"Please leave," she whispered, hugging her knees to her chest.

She could feel him watching her but she ignored him. A moment later he left her without a word and she angrily threw the first thing she could find against the wall (Ward's ratted copy of _Paradise Lost_) and used her pillow to muffle a scream.

She hated him. She hated this. She hated everything. She wanted nothing more than to feel nothing. But she couldn't. She felt everything. So much it made her sick.

_Then why do you have his things? Why are you wearing his old Academy sweatshirt? Why can't you erase him? _

"I don't know!" She snapped at the voice in her head. A sob escaped her chest and she curled up around her comforter, clutching a tiny stuffed dog to her chest. It was Ward's. It still smelled like him. Like everything else. She didn't know what had compelled her to take all of his things and hoard them in her bedroom but she had.

She knew the man she'd fallen in love with was a lie but it didn't make mourning losing him any easier. Once again she'd given a man everything only to have him completely betray her.

She was done. After her shitty childhood she'd tried, hard, to trust people and find love but Miles? Ward? Her entire life being a lie? She couldn't do it, not anymore. It hurt too much.

Everything just…

She wasn't sure how her tiny body could produce the wail that came out of her but she was now not only in full grief mode but in the middle of a panic attack.

She'd been stupid. So stupid. And he'd…oh God, just thinking about their last few encounters made her sick to her stomach.

Skye covered her mouth and rushed out of the room she shared with Jemma and made a beeline to the bathroom. She hated that there was only one and-"Oh God, fuck," she muttered as she found the door locked. She turned and found the first thing she could find (a fake plant) and threw up every bit of ice cream she'd inhaled while sobbing.

"I can't do this," she whispered over and over as she fell to the floor, still crying.

She'd tried to throw herself into training and it hadn't worked, she'd tried to shove down her feelings and it only made it hurt more; how was she supposed to get through this when everything reminded her of Ward? Of the people he'd killed? Of the people who had died to keep her safe?

How was she supposed to keep pretending to be fine when the organization that was her family, that had kept her alive, was gone? Coulson could talk about rebuilding all he wanted but they were fugitives, ghosts. This was too big for them.

"_Are you sure you don't want to-"_

"_No, Trip, he doesn't deserve it," Skye whispered as she stared down at the group from the catwalk. She hadn't known Trip long but for some reason she trusted him (after all he hadn't murdered fellow agents in cold blood and betrayed his grandfather's legacy). _

_She tried not to dwell on Ward's words to her. She'd been wary of May's anger but after that…well, seeing his broken face didn't hurt her the way it would have yesterday. _

_Skye turned to go anywhere but here, she couldn't look at him anymore and she refused to acknowledge his existence but his eyes met hers for a brief moment and an anger she didn't even know she could possess took over her entire body._

"_Skye? You're shak-"_

"_Get me out of here."_

"_Wha-"_

"_If you don't I will _kill _him."_

"_The only way out of here is down there, Skye, you'll have to-"_

_She shoved past him. "Fine." She was seething. She hadn't hit him hard enough earlier, maybe one more good punch would do him good._

"_Hey, no," Trip whispered as he took hold of her arm. She was now three feet away from him and…_

_She was so _weak_._

"_I will _never_ forgive you; I _hate _you. I hope you rot in prison because hell is too good for you."_

"_Skye, come on-" it was May now but Skye couldn't take her eyes off of him. He'd been angry a moment before but now…good, he deserved his pain because it couldn't be half as bad as what she was feeling. _

_Her heart was broken. This…she'd gotten used to being cast aside by her foster families. That pain was nothing compared to what she felt right now. _

_She watched as they carted him the plane and waited until he was out of her sight to turn and sob into May's chest._

"Shh, baby, it's okay, I've got you," May whispered, echoing the same words she'd said to her two weeks ago.

Skye leaned into her, still crying. "I know I need to do this for the team but I ca-"

"Shh, you don't have to do anything."

"I can't. I can't…if I see him…"

May pressed a kiss to the top of her head. "He's not going to talk; he just wants to…we can do this without him. He will cave, eventually."

"But Coul-"

"Will get over it. He understands, Skye."

Skye pulled away and wiped at her eyes angrily with her sleeves. "But he's the director now and-"

May took her face in her hands and gave her a very 'mom' look. "You still come first."

Skye glanced away with a nod, embarrassed. She wasn't used to crying in front of people. When you were an orphan you learned how to keep your emotions in check but lately…

"You know, I used to think you didn't like me," Skye whispered as she met May's gaze.

A smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "I tried not to."

"Why?"

"Aside from you breaking into S.H.I.E.L.D.? And that stunt you pulled with your boyfriend?"

Skye blushed and nodded.

May sighed. "You remind me…let's just say you remind me of a life I could have had."

Skye stared at her in confusion. "What-"

"Come, let's get you cleaned up," May whispered as she helped her to her feet. "My mother has a recipe for nausea and don't tell Coulson but I know just will help with your appetite."

"Yeah, what's that?"

"Cheeseburgers," May whispered conspiratorially. "By the time everyone else realizes I'm making dinner you'll have already had as many as you want."

Skye smiled and leaned into May, feeling just a little better already. At least with May nothing came with strings attached.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two and a half years ago (July 2014) … <strong>_

"This is your last chance, Skye. I know you're angry and you have every right to be but-"

"I'm sure, old man," Skye said firmly. She wouldn't have any regrets. For the first time in a long time she felt steady, she knew what she had to do, and she refused to damage the peace she'd found just so Grant Ward could have closure.

Coulson looked uncomfortable and she sighed. "Just say it."

"He has a right to-"

"He lost that right a long time ago, sir," Jemma piped up. Skye was glad to have her support but she turned to her in surprise. Jemma being away from her lab or Fitz's bedside was rare and Skye hadn't even noticed her sitting in the corner picking at a piece of toast.

"I'm just saying, once Maria's team gets here there won't be another chance. He'll be in a maximum security prison for the rest of his life. Don't you think-"

"Leave it, Phil."

Skye sighed. Great, the last thing she needed was to be in the middle of another one of mom and dad's fights.

"You would be on her-"

"Don't bring your own issues into-"

"Don't you think if he knows that it will make him want to-"

"That's not your choice to make!"

"You know all about making choices, don't you, Melinda?"

"Okay, time out!" Skye yelled, not in the mood. "As much fun as it is being surrounded by liars," May had the decency to look ashamed, "and people who want to buy into Ward's sob story for their own selfish reasons," Coulson looked appalled, "I have better things to do.

I don't need closure. He is going where he belongs. I don't care how tragic his backstory is, he _killed_ people. He tried to murder Fitz and Simmons, he put us all in danger, and I will not tolerate threats to _my family_.

If I go to see him…" She swallowed hard. "That will put my family at risk and sometimes…" She met May's eyes, knowing she'd been hard on her. "Sometimes you have to make hard choices to keep the people you love safe.

I hope he does get help. I don't want him to suffer but I do want him to pay for his crimes. But that doesn't mean I need to have anything to do with him."

"Skye-"

"Coulson, is he ready to go?"

Skye had never been happier to see the new head of Stark Security. She gave Maria a smile before slipping out of the room. She knew if she stayed…

No. She was stronger than that. She had to be now. This wasn't about her anymore.

She stopped at Fitz's room and watched over him sadly. The steady whir of machinery was a constant reminder of why Grant Ward finally being handed over into federal custody was the right thing to do. She knew Coulson wanted to save everyone but not everyone could be saved.

Fitz was proof of that. Nearly three months and no change. Jemma was falling apart at the seams. She barely ate, barely slept, and Skye knew she blamed herself. There was only one person to blame and he was getting what he deserved.

"Don't worry, kid, things will be alright."

But she wasn't sure she believed it.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Present day (October 2016) … <strong>_

"Nice hair."

"Shut it, Fitzy," Skye muttered as she scrunched her nose. She hadn't had bangs since she was five. This was embarrassing, she looked like a child.

Jemma slapped Fitz's arm playfully. "I think you look lovely."

"Not as lovely as you," Fitz whispered as he kissed Jemma's temple and pulled her closer. Jemma giggled as he moved to her neck and Skye rolled her eyes.

"Thanks, Jem," Skye replied dryly, too wound-up and antsy to find their behavior cute today. She crossed her arms with a sigh; she couldn't believe she'd agreed to do this.

"_How many times have I told-"_

"_We need him!"_

"_No, you think we-"_

"_Skye, we need someone who can infiltrate Hydra! If they think he's escaped of his own volition-"_

"_What they'll welcome him back with open arms? Is that it! "_

"_We need to finish eliminating them as a threat! We have them on all sides! Hydra, the escaped convicts from the Fridge, your fa-"_

"Don't_ call him that," Skye whispered darkly. _

_He met her eyes regretfully. "I'm sorry, Skye, but with him out there…I will do whatever I have to do to keep you safe. I think you more than anyone understand that feeling."_

"_That doesn't mean you go running to Ward! And I can keep myself safe!"_

"_It's not just about you anymore, Skye."_

God she hated when he was right.

"Who butchered Skye's hair?"

Skye glared in Trip's direction, not in the mood. "Did you have fun on your little date?"

"I wasn't aware recon duty was considered romantic," Trip teased as he ruffled her hair, "but considering your idea of romance is falling love with dirty, rotten murder-"

"Children, please; no need to fight over me," their new arrival announced by kissing the top of Skye's head.

"Shut up, Lance," Skye growled. His beard tickled her chin and it annoyed her that he and Trip were so much taller than she was. She was sick of being used as a leaning post for them and treated like a child. She was not the child here, she thought bitterly as she glared at them. They were the biggest pair of overgrown man-children she'd ever seen.

"Who shoved a stick up Skye's ass?"

"The only one who has things up their ass is you," Trip teased.

She rolled her eyes and moved to the cupboard in need of something to put in her mouth before she punched someone in theirs.

"Yeah, I think we both know that's not true, mate."

"Oy, I'm trying to eat a sandwich! When a lady makes you a sandwich you don't need to hear about dicks in people's arses!"

"Stop! All three of you! You're all children!" Jemma scolded. "Besides, Lance, you can't blame her for being a tad bit uptight today. After all…well, you _know_."

"No matter how low you whisper, Jem, I can hear you!"

Jemma sighed but it was Fitz who spoke. "I know it's hard, Skye. I don't want him here either but if it keeps-"

"Yeah, yeah, I know." She caught Lance watching her critically and she groaned. "It's just hair!"

"I know but it's like you're a new person, I barely recognize you."

Skye snorted. "Yeah, think I'd be able to fool my own mother?"

"Dammit where is-" May froze as she entered the room and blinked in surprise. "Skye?"

She smiled sheepishly with a shrug. "What do you think? Do I pass for Special Agent Serinda May?"

"It's…I wish we weren't fugitives so I could send her a picture, it's…wow."

Skye shrugged it off. She didn't think the resemblance was that close. In fact her baby sister looked a lot more like a younger, carefree version of May.

"Come, Fitz, it's time for physical therapy."

Fitz groaned. "Jemma, I don't-I still have half my sandwich left!"

Jemma gave him a hard stare. "If I hear one complaint from you, Leopold Fitz, you'll be sleeping alone for the next week, got it?"

"I'll just take this, then," Trip announced, taking the rest of Fitz's sandwich.

When Fitz began to whine Jemma gave him the death stare again. His mouth opened like a fish and he stammered for a full thirty seconds before growling with a stomp of his foot. "Fine," he complained as he headed out of the kitchen. "But I want you to do that thing you don't like to do!"

"In his dreams," Jemma muttered as she reached for a cookie.

"I heard that!"

"Good! Because I'm not doing it!"

"You should do it more, it's rather enjoyable," Lance teased with a wink.

Jemma scoffed with a roll of her eyes and left the room without dignifying his words with a response.

"You guys are terrible," Skye scolded.

"Oh come on, she can behave as prim and proper as she wants but you don't have to share a wall with-" Trip gave his sometimes lover a shake of the head and he sighed. "Fine, take their side as always. Sometimes I think you should be fucking them instead."

Trip rolled his eyes. "Come on, we've been sitting in a damn van for days; I need a shower."

"So? Go? Why do you need me to-" Trip gave him a 'look'. "Oh, right. See you later, ladies."

Now it was May's turn to roll her eyes (Lance had that effect on people). "Idiots."

"Yeah," Skye whispered sadly. She didn't know how but they'd all somehow found a way to be happy again, even with everything being stacked against them. She was terrified of ruining that.

"Hey, I know…you're incredibly brave, Skye; you can do this."

May gave her arms a squeeze and Skye nodded.

"I know but…I don't have a good feeling about this."

May reached up and ran her fingers over Skye's new hair. "Don't worry, baby girl, we're all here for you. Nothing bad will happen without one hell of a fight from us."

"You're right, I know, it's just-"

"You worry."

Skye nodded and May pulled her against her chest. Skye wrapped her arms around May's middle, hugging her back tightly.

"I know you do, baby; I do the same thing when it's you."

"So you're not the only one who has a stomach filled with knots right now?"

"Nope."

Skye closed her eyes, glad she wasn't alone. After a long moment she sighed and pulled away. "So…ready to break our ex-boyfriend out of prison?"

May groaned. "I will give you one-hundred dollars if you never call him that again."

"Deal," Skye replied with a smirk.


	3. (Grant) It's Probably What's Best For Yo

**Title: **Fix a Heart  
><strong>Chapter 03:<strong> (Grant) It's Probably What's Best for You  
><strong>Author:<strong> snarkysweetness  
><strong>Rating:<strong> R  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Skye, Grant, Melinda, Phil, Jemma, Fitz, Trip, Lance Hunter, Isabelle Hartley, Billy & Sam Koenig, Bobbi Morse, Clint, Natasha, Raina, Kate Bishop, Skye's father, Alice Linn, Maria, Tony, Bruce, Steve, May's mom & sister, Talbot, & others that may pop in from time to time  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Skyeward, Fitzsimmons, Philinda, Triplett/Hunter, & Clintasha with past Isabelle/Victoria, Clint/Bobbi, & May/her ex-husband  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Season Two AU: Two and a half years after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Coulson and his team are still struggling to rise from the ashes, slowly piecing their lives and organization back together one shard at a time. With nowhere else to turn and the life of one of their own on the line they're left with no choice but to break Ward out of prison and bring him along for the ride. Filled with angst, betrayal, romance, and snark! Come along for the whimsical ride down what will never happen in season two.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Heavy-handed on the angst, mentions to Bahrain and China, sexual situations, cursing, mild-violence, & oh yes did I mention there's angst?  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I own nothing.  
><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> As you can see I'm only giving you pieces to solve the puzzle. See what I did there?

_**Two and a half years ago (April 2014) … **_

"_And you've got the rest of your life to wrestle with the question: who are you without him?"_

Grant hated to admit it but Coulson had a point.

He'd spent the past few hours pondering his question and he had come up with nothing. His life had been about surviving until John had saved him. Then it had become about helping John survive. He owed John everything. He had guided him, raised him, given him a purpose, and now he had no one.

John was dead and Skye hated him and he had nothing left to live for.

She'd been the one good thing in his life, the one thing he'd found on his own, and now she absolutely loathed him.

There was nothing left for him; _nothing_.

He felt dead and hollow inside but he continued to put on a brave face, refusing to be seen as weak.

But he was weak. He wished May had killed him; it was what he would have done. And death seemed peaceful. Easy. Quiet. He'd prefer death to rotting away in a prison cell.

And if he died there would be no one to mourn him.

What a waste his life had been.

The only good thing in his life had been Skye and he'd…he felt sick to his stomach. And if he felt this way…he didn't know what had come over him. He was a monster. A monster who wanted to bring her down to his level; he was sick. She deserved better.

He wished he would die; then she could be truly free of him. He owed her that much.

God, he loved her.

She was the one bright spot in the black hole that was his life. He wished he could have been better. Been the man she deserved. But he wasn't. He was nothing.

"Take him to a cell and leave him there until he decides to talk. He'll crack after a few days." Coulson was still pissed.

Grant avoided him and glanced up for a fleeting moment and was met with Skye. She stared down at him angrily and he was too weak to look away. She began to shake and…he closed his eyes. This was his fault. He'd done this.

When he opened his eyes she was coming at him fast and she looked ready to hit him. Good. He deserved it. He'd take a hundred beatings at her hand if he had to; anything to make things right. But she didn't hit him, instead Trip restrained her but she was close enough that he could feel her pain and anger radiating off of her.

"I will _never_ forgive you; I _hate_ you. I hope you rot in prison because hell is too good for you." She spat, wounding him with only a few words. He deserved every ounce of hate she sent his way but it didn't stop it from hurting.

He wished he could reach out but it was May who was there to comfort her.

He was the reason she was in pain.

He was going to be sick.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two and a half years ago (May 2014) … <strong>_

"I'm sorry, Grant, she…" Coulson slid a plate forward and gave him a regretful look. "She's not ready."

"Not hungry," Grant muttered, still refusing to speak in full sentences. Unless he could see her, unless he could apologize, to try to make her understand so maybe, just maybe, he could fix things enough that she could move on and be happy then he didn't want to talk.

"You have to eat something."

"What happened to 'torture'?"

He knew Coulson didn't have the stones to follow through with his threats.

Coulson didn't blink an eye. "I dug around, read the parts of your file that weren't included in your assessment for the team. Skye was smart enough to back up everything, for when we're ready to stop running." He leaned forward and forced Grant to meet his eyes. "I'm not entirely convinced you're as bad as you think you are."

Grant simply blinked back. He wasn't going to play these games with him. "I want to see her."

Coulson sat back in his chair with a sigh. "And if she doesn't come around?"

Grant shrugged.

"I want that plate empty when I come back."

They both knew it wouldn't be.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two and a half years ago (June 2014) … <strong>_

"She's not coming?"

He knew that look. He was used to it. He just wasn't expecting to see it today. He knew she didn't owe him anything, let alone a goodbye, but he missed her.

"I'm sorry."

"Come on, Ward, there's a lovely cell at Pelican Bay waiting for you."

He ignored Hill, accompanied by Talbot, and kept his eyes on Coulson.

"I really am sorry."

And he believed him. "I know."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two years ago (December 2014) … <strong>_

"_You've spent your whole life following someone else's lead. Who are you, Grant? What do you want?"_

He'd been locked away in this hellhole for five months and he still didn't have an answer for his therapist.

"You've stopped eating again. Do you want us to have to put you back on a tube? Do you remember how unpleasant that was?"

"Don't care."

She crossed her legs with a sigh. "You can't starve yourself to death; it's not going to do anyone any good."

"Neither is keeping me alive."

"So, we're back to this again?"

He was done talking.

* * *

><p><em><strong>One and a half years ago (March 2015) … <strong>_

A new prison. A new cell. A new therapist.

And he still had no fucking clue who he was.

But he knew what he wanted. Or rather who.

He still wanted to die.

* * *

><p><em><strong>One year ago (September 2015) … <strong>_

"You shaved."

"I want to look nice for her."

"Has she answered your letter?"

"No."

"But you're hopeful?"

He shrugged, unsure.

"Well, it's something."

"Yeah, it is."

* * *

><p><em><strong>One year ago (October 2015) … <strong>_

He sat in the corner of his cell, on the floor, sobbing.

Her name was the only thing that emerged from his lips, like a prayer. A prayer of pain. What had he done?

"Skye, Skye, Skye."

Who in the hell had he become?

* * *

><p><em><strong>One year ago (October 2015) … <strong>_

His therapist called it a vitamin B deficiency due to his new hunger strike. He called it going out of his fucking mind.

He saw her everywhere. When he was let out for his walks. In his sleep. In his cell.

She was haunting him.

They'd thrown him into a padded cell 'for his safety' but it hadn't helped. Their drug cocktails didn't help. The force feeding didn't help.

She was his goddamn ghost of sins past and he wanted so desperately for her to be real.

He'd sent so many pleas for her to come, tried to write her letters explaining why he'd done what he'd done, but they'd all been returned. He'd burned the lot of them and then spent a week in SHU.

She was never going to come. All he had were his delusions.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Eleven months ago (November 2015) … <strong>_

He began to live for his hallucinations.

Fuck, he needed help.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Two months ago (August 2016) … <strong>_

"No one."

His therapist, his fifth, glanced up in surprise. He was in a new prison; somewhere back in California, but it didn't matter. This was his life now, he'd come to accept it. Moved every few months to prevent being 'comfortable'. Always kept in solitary. He was a national security threat. Considering everything he'd done, he knew it could be worse.

Coulson had found a way to convince them he needed help. These therapy sessions had been forced on him. It wasn't until he realized John had simply replaced his brother that he began to take it seriously.

He'd fucked up so much and he was still broken but he wanted not to be.

It was the least he could do for her. Even if she'd never know, he had to do this for her.

"What?"

"I'm no one. You all keep…I'm no one."

"What do you mean, Grant?"

"My whole life I've been that scared kid who couldn't stick up to his big brother. And now…I don't know who I am. I guess I'm no one."

His therapist closed his binder. "Well, now we're getting somewhere."

* * *

><p><em><strong>Present day (October 2016) … <strong>_

Grant sat in shock as he stared at her. He blinked repeatedly. This had to be another hallucination. She couldn't really…he felt tears in his eyes as he struggled to grasp for reality. He closed his eyes and tried to fight off her image but when he opened them there she was, still staring away from him.

He'd dreamt of her coming to see him for so long…but he never thought…

Why did it have to be now? He'd been doing so well. He didn't have the answers he'd been looking for yet but he hoped to someday. He was still damaged but he was piecing himself back together. He wanted her to see the end result, to see the man who could someday be worthy of her, not this shattered mess.

She was still as beautiful as he remembered and God, he still loved her.

"Sk…Skye? Is…" He struggled to find his voice but this was her. He could smell that faint body mist she was so fond of and she looked different. Different meant it was her. If she'd looked the same...

"Sweetheart? Is that you? You're really here?"

He didn't even care that he was about to cry. His therapist insisted expression his emotions was healthy. And if there was anyone he trusted to see him like this it was her. He knew now love wasn't weakness, it was strength, and she made him want to be strong.

"Shh, it's me," she hissed as she turned her head slightly. She averted her eyes but he could see her now. She was _older_; she'd changed the hair, her clothes, she held herself in a stiffer manner, and she was…hard was the only way he could describe it. This wasn't the spirited girl he'd fallen in love with. She was just as broken as he was and he knew he was to blame.

And there was something else, something he couldn't identify, but…

He stood, drawn to her like a damn moth to a flame, even after all these years.

Grant avoided the flickering lights and very slowly approached her, not wanting to spook her, but still needed to assure himself she was real. He didn't trust himself not to imagine all of this.

When she jumped back from him he knew he deserved it but it didn't stop the pain he felt. He hadn't meant to…

"Sk-Skye?"

"I need your help," she said cutting right to the chase.

He nodded. He'd do anything for her; _anything_, which terrified him. There were so many things he never wanted to be forced to do again. But for her; he'd go straight into the pits of Hell if she asked him to.

"You said once…you'd found things out about me? And when Coulson…he said it was about my parents and that you would only tell me?"

He opened his mouth and then closed it. Right, she hadn't read his letters…

"Skye, I'm-"

"I don't care. There are only three things I want to know: everything about my parents, if you still have contacts within Hydra, and if you're committed to proving you can change."

He nodded once more. He'd tell her anything she wanted. And…he _had_ changed. Maybe not enough for her but he was trying.

"Tomorrow, noon; I'd recommend staying away from the outer wall of your cell, unless you want to get blown up, in which case, be my guest."

He flinched at that. He deserved it.

But he couldn't let her leave yet. "What-wait! I need to tell you-"

"There's no time, tomorrow."

"Skye!" He called desperately. He had to tell her…just _once_. He'd missed his chance and he needed to do this for his recovery and because if they were going to work together she needed to understand.

"No." He could hear the pain in her voice but he continued anyway, he couldn't let her leave without knowing. She had the right to know, before she broke him out of here; it could very well be a deal breaker.

"Skye, I still-" She disappeared and the door slammed behind her. "Love you," he finished weakly as he fell back into his chair.

"I still love you."

**Characters:** Skye, Grant, Melinda, Phil, Jemma, Fitz, Trip, Lance Hunter, Isabelle Hartley, Billy & Sam Koenig, Bobbi Morse, Clint, Natasha, Raina, Kate Bishop, Skye's father, Alice Linn, Maria, Tony, Bruce, Steve, May's mom & sister, Talbot, & others that may pop in from time to time


	4. (Grant) I Only Want What's Best for You

**Title: **Fix a Heart  
><strong>Chapter 04:<strong> (Grant) I Only Want What's Best for You  
><strong>Author:<strong> snarkysweetness  
><strong>Rating:<strong> R  
><strong>Characters:<strong> Skye, Grant, Melinda, Phil, Jemma, Fitz, Trip, Lance, Isabelle, Billy & Sam Koenig, Bobbi, Clint, Natasha, Raina, Kate, Idaho, Mack, Skye's father, Alice Linn, Maria, Tony, Bruce, Steve, Sam, May's mom & sister, Sharon, Donnie, Claire, Talbot, Ward's brother, & others that may pop in  
><strong>Pairings:<strong> Skyeward, Fitzsimmons, Philinda, Triphunter, Huntingbird & Clintasha with past Isabelle/Victoria, Clint/Bobbi, & May/Skye's Father  
><strong>Summary:<strong> Season Two AU: Two and a half years after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Coulson and his team are still struggling to rise from the ashes, slowly piecing their lives and organization back together one shard at a time. With nowhere else to turn and the life of one of their own on the line they're left with no choice but to break Ward out of prison and bring him along for the ride. Filled with angst, betrayal, romance, and snark! Come along for the whimsical ride down what will never happen in season two.  
><strong>Warnings:<strong> Heavy-handed on the angst, mentions to Bahrain and China, sexual situations, cursing, mild-violence, & oh yes did I mention there's angst?  
><strong>Disclaimer:<strong> I own nothing.  
><strong>Author's Notes:<strong> I'm very sorry it's taken so long to update but this chapter had to be perfect because it sets up the entire rest of this story and I'm a perfectionist. I've literally written entire sections of this at least five times and the entire thing once. Anyway, here it is finally and it's a very lengthy chapter which I hope makes up for the wait. I also fell in love with Mack and Idaho so I had to find ways to work them in along with a few small tidbits from spoilers and things we've already seen this season that I thought fit with this and I wanted to work in. So, here it is, I'm very sorry for the emotional rollercoaster but most of you did quite literally ask for it. And no matter what you think is happening, read until the end because I guarantee you're wrong.

Grant didn't know what he'd been expecting but it sure as hell wasn't the half-assed explosion that only took out part of the prison wall. He furrowed his brows and glanced out his tiny cell window. He knew Skye; her bombs were some of the best he'd ever seen (which had always made him question how she knew _how_ to make them so well) so he caught on quickly that her bomb was meant to be a diversion. His suspicions were confirmed when the alarms sounded for a lock-down and the guards rushed past, headed for the prison yard.

"Babe, what in the hell are you up to?" He muttered as he continued his watch for her while clutching the small pillowcase filled with his few meager possessions.

He tapped his foot and glanced to the hole in the wall. Had he read this situation wrong? Was he expected to climb through that?

No, that was stu-"Holy shit," he whispered as he caught sight of Skye sliding down rope on a harness from the duct system in the hallway. She was…this was really not the appropriate time to be thinking the thoughts running through his mind.

"Stand back," she called and he jumped backwards. A moment later a small explosion sounded as the lock to his door was blown off. "Hurry!"

Grant slipped into the hallway and caught a harness that she threw his way.

"Follow me up and to the left, there's an opening that goes up to the roof. We have about two minutes before we get shot at so try not to get me killed," she said before disappearing through the ceiling.

Grant sighed. He was really going to do this, wasn't he?

Fucking A.

He followed her and moments later they were rushing across the roof to a waiting helicopter. And sure enough as they jumped in there was gunfire.

"This is the worst prison escape of all time!" He'd fallen in love with a lunatic.

"Yeah? Well let's see what you could pull off while living underground and on the run from the law, asshole!" Skye spat back as she threw her gear in and jumped into the 'copter.

"Children, enough; you can argue later. You know, when the men with guns aren't shooting at us!" Trip called as he held out a hand to help Grant in. Grant gave Trip a quick 'thanks' before buckling in. Trip slammed the door shut and they were off.

"Wait, who's flying the-"

"Next time I'm not breaking into the prison and flying the getaway car," Skye muttered from the pilot's seat.

"Holy crap," Grant muttered. She'd looked damn fine in her tactical gear and hoodie but now…wow. And it wasn't just because he'd been living surrounded by men for nearly three years either. She had somehow gotten more beautiful than he remembered.

"Dude, don't let her catch on to how turned on you are, she might shoot you in the dick," Trip whispered. "Trust me, she came this close once," he muttered motioning with his fingers. "And I was only kidding."

His…Grant snorted. "Yeah, I'll believe that when I see it." Though, hadn't he already? She was different and it had been a long time. Maybe she wasn't the same person anymore.

"Your funeral," Trip warned before moving into his own seat.

"What are you bitching about? You weren't the one up all night staking this place out. Next time if you want me to fly the damn helicopter you can send someone else!"

Skye snorted. "Oh yeah, because we have so many agents to pick from with you playing around with everyone Maria poached at Stark Industries and everyone else in hiding or in prison or Hydra."

Were things really that bad?

"Yeah, yeah; you're lucky I owed you a favor."

Skye laughed but not in the beautiful way he remembered. No, this was more a 'shut up before I punch you in the dick' laugh.

Grant's head was spinning.

Twenty minutes later they landed in an old abandoned airfield that looked like the last time it had been in use was during the S.S.R. days. From there they got in a black, unmarked SUV and drove another hour through the middle of nowhere.

Grant said nothing the entire ride. He just listened to Skye and Trip bicker over everything right down to the songs on the radio. It was beginning to make him feel uncomfortable. By the time they drove into an underground bunker to park the car he was relieved to get the hell out of there.

He didn't want to make assumptions but he was almost positive Skye had moved on and while he wanted her to be happy he didn't need to witness it; especially not if it was with Trip the boy scout who was everything Grant could never be.

For the first time since agreeing to this he realized what a mistake this was. Sure, he knew he didn't want to be here. He wanted to pay for his crimes and he didn't owe S.H.I.E.L.D. anything but he'd come for her. Because he still loved her. Because her happiness mattered more to him than his own and if he could keep her safe then it would be worth it.

But it had never occurred to him that she'd have a new life.

He was an idiot.

Skye and Trip both flashed their lanyards for a scanner and kept them up as they barged into the base.

Grant followed numbly. "So what are we-"

He froze as they flashed their lanyards to-no.

"You guys can deal with him, we have things to do," Skye instructed as a second Koenig emerged.

Grant blinked and opened his mouth and…"Skye?" But she was gone and he was left along with…he was going to be sick.

"You must be Agent Ward, you can just step this way. The director will be on his way down shortly. We have a few protocols to go through but then we'll get you all set up with a lanyard," the first Koenig instructed.

"Oh, I'm sure he's all-too-familiar with the protocols," said the second.

The first groaned. "Sam, what did I tell-"

"He killed Eric."

"I know that, but-"

Grant had to grab hold of the wall and take deep breaths. When his therapist had gone over being forced to face his actions this wasn't what he had in mind. He was going to be sick. There were…who in the hell had thought it was a good idea to have the brothers of the man he'd killed be his welcoming party?

"Billy, Sam, what are you doing to Agent Ward?"

"Not an agent," Grant muttered as he glanced up to find Coulson watching him with May flanking a few feet behind. Great, could this get any better?

"See, you've made him uncomfortable. I'm sorry about him, he lacks tact. Come this way, we'll get your lie detector test out of the way first."

Grant hesitated for a moment and then nodded. If anyone had the right to be upset here it wasn't him.

"I'm Billy, by the way."

Grant nodded and followed him quietly as Billy rambled on about lanyards and the base and all of this was eerily familiar.

Once he was strapped in Billy stood at the machinery while Sam stayed close to make sure he wasn't employing any tricks to beat the test. Meanwhile Coulson and May stood in the back of the room watching him.

"What is your full name?"

Oh yeah, very familiar.

"Sir?" Billy glanced over at Coulson once he'd gotten the basics out of the way.

"Grant, I'm sorry about this, but we have to."

"What-ow!" And for the second time in his life he was unknowingly injected with a truth serum.

"Like I said, we have to. Give it a few minutes to kick in and then we'll resume."

"I should have known you bastards only broke me out to torture me," Grant muttered bitterly, feeling dizzy and sore where the needle had pierced his arm.

"I think he's good to go, Phil," May quipped with a smirk.

Coulson shot her a 'look'. "Try to look less pleased, Melinda."

"Not happening."

"God, can the two of you fuck already? The bickering's old."

May was still smirking. "You know, for a murderous bastard, he's amusing when he's high."

"Now is not the ti-"

"Why are you here?" Billy interrupted, deciding to get on with this interrogation.

"Because you brought me here," he sassed. No amount of drugs in this world would make him endure this with a smile on his face.

Coulson smirked in May's direction before stepping closer, his attention on Grant. "I think what he means, Grant, is why did you agree to come?"

Grant glanced up and met Coulson's eyes. "You know why," he said evenly, not in the mood to discuss his feelings. Not about her, not here, not to anyone but Skye herself.

"No. I don't. I haven't seen or spoken to you in over two years. I don't know who you are anymore or why you would want to help us. And before we can allow you to be around our agents, to live on our base, before we decide to trust you in our home we need to know why you agreed to come here."

"It sure as hell isn't for you."

"Then why?"

Coulson kept his eyes on Grant's and after a moment he had to look away, unable to stand the intensity of his gaze. His eyes scanned the room until they landed on a wall of surveillance equipment. On one of the monitors Skye stood in the kitchen with Jemma and he sighed dreamily as every ounce of resistance left in him faded; Coulson's truth serum was good.

"I told you; he's here for her," May muttered in a sharp tone. She uncrossed her arms and glared at Coulson angrily.

Coulson avoided her and stared down at Grant. "Ward," he said, firmly this time. "Why are you here? If you don't answer me I'd be happy to give Colonel Talbot a call; rumor has it he works for you brother these days. Did you know he'd been elected senator?"

Using his family to coerce him, that was…well, it was impressive, actually. Garrett would have done worse. He continued to watch Skye for a long moment before slowly turning his gaze to the director. "Skye," he answered finally. This was useless, they all knew why he was here but if Coulson needed to hear him say it, fine. He had nothing to hide; not anymore.

"I'm here for Skye," he repeated evenly. "I am not loyal to you or to S.H.I.E.L.D. I am not here to make amends or to be your good little soldier. I have no interest in any of this, I never did. I was only ever in S.H.I.E.L.D. and Hydra for John, because he saved me and I owed him a debt.

I'm sorry for what I did but I can't change the past," he spared both Koenig's a look knowing they were due better than some crap apology from him. "I deserved to be locked in prison and I'd much rather be there than be here working for you but if Skye needs my help, then I'm in. I owe her that much."

He met Coulson's eyes once more. "And she does, right? That's why I'm here? She's in danger, isn't she?" He was so worried. For them to have come to him for help they had to be desperate. He just wanted to keep her safe.

She was the only thing left in this world that he still loved; he needed her to be okay.

"We'll ask the questions, Ward," May snapped.

Coulson crossed his arms and gave her another 'look'. They argued for a moment using only their stares until she rolled her eyes and Coulson turned back to him with a sigh.

Those two were fucking frightening as a pair.

"We have a few more questions; Grant and then you can ask yours, deal?"

"Fine." It wasn't but if he hoped to find out anything he'd have to keep playing along. Besides, he was too damn tired to fight off the dizzying feeling of the drug in his system. He'd be asleep soon and he wanted his questions answered before that happened.

"We need to know everything you know about Skye's parents."

May shifted uncomfortably and leaned into Coulson. "Father," she muttered but he ignored her.

Grant closed his eyes, already feeling the urge to sleep; shit that sodium pentothal was strong.

"I um…" He opened them as a vivid image of the massacre came to him. "Her parents…they murdered that village looking for her. S.H.I.E.L.D. took her not long after she was born, I'm not sure why but they hid her in China to keep her safe. They tracked the team down and…they killed everyone. The agents assigned to keep her safe, the villagers; an agent managed to get her away before they could find her and when a new team arrived they found her in the dead agents arms, covered in blood." That last part Skye had told him herself, but he wasn't sure what she'd shared with them so he was going to tell them everything he knew.

The elder agents exchanged a worried glance. It was May who spoke up first, her voice on the verge of breaking. "What do you mean they were looking for her? Was it…" Coulson took May's hand and gave it a squeeze and Grant could see her composure wavering. "Were they planning to kill her too?"

Something felt off about this line of questioning but if it helped Skye then he wouldn't try to stay quiet. "I'm not entirely sure. Raina studied Skye's D.N.A. on the flash drive. Her genetic material matched that of a girl she'd studied once before and she told me a story about a pair of monsters that tore apart a village in China searching for that baby. And when I asked if the monsters also killed the baby's parents…" Grant still remembered how sick hearing the story had made him feel. Skye…he didn't want her to know any of this, she deserved better. She didn't need this pain. But she already knew part of the story and he knew his girl wouldn't stop until she had her answers.

He took a deep breath. "The monsters were the baby's parents."

The Koenigs shared a glance and between May and Coulson Grant was sure there would be vomit in the trashcan.

"Did she say anything else?" May asked.

This was the part that he didn't want to talk about, the part that made him sick. He'd been so lost then, so easily manipulated. There was nothing he could do that would make up for what he'd wanted to do.

"She…claims that a darkness lies within Skye, that she and Garrett both saw her future. She believes that she can awaken that darkness and when she does Skye will become something divine; a monster, like her parents."

_You could be monsters together. _

The fact that he'd entertained the idea of taking her to her father so she could be destroyed, so he could finally be worthy of her, so they could be together…he closed his eyes and fought off the urge to vomit.

"What…" May met Coulson's eyes and he pulled her closer. It was only a brief second but he caught her hands shaking. May was terrified. He'd never seen her look anything but completely composed or angry.

Before he could ask what was going on Coulson spoke. "What did she mean by 'darkness'?"

Grant shrugged. "I don't know, she was talking crazy, like Garrett, but she did tell me something else." He looked between the two agents and finally settled on Coulson. "Skye's father is alive; he's been looking for her. S.H.I.E.L.D. was right to keep her hidden, he never stopped." Neither of them looked surprised and he knew; Skye really was in danger. "Raina went to him, didn't she? Is he after Skye? Did he find her? Please, tell me something! I've done everything you've asked."

"I'm sorry, we have a few more question-"

"Stop coddling him, Phillip! Now is not the time!" May pulled away from him and rounded on Grant so she was staring down at him angrily. "Skye is in danger and unfortunately you're the only person with any answers since everyone else who may have them is working for Hydra."

"Melinda-"

"No, he needs to know. This isn't a game!" May and Coulson were toe-to-toe now and they both looked pissed. "I am not losing her again! Not to him! Not to anyone!"

"Well, Melinda, maybe next time don't marry a psychopa-"

"Don't you dare blame me for this!" She hissed and Grant was very, very afraid for Coulson. Melinda May could kill a man with her pinkie and she looked ready to destroy him.

And oh God his head was pounding and it was so heavy…

"Those experiments-"

"Stop-"

"Want to wager they were to bring out her 'darkness'? Ward just said it; he thinks she's a monster like him, hell, like you. Isn't that what you used to call yourself, Melinda? Maybe he just wanted her to join the family busine-"

"Skye's my angel, she's not a monster," Grant mumbled as his head fell against his chest. "My angel. My Skye. Love her so much…"

May fell to his feet and helped him by lifting his head. She inspected him but all he could see were stars where her face should be. "Goddammit, Phil, how much was in that dose you gave him?"

Coulson rounded on the Koenigs and shot one of them, Sam maybe, a glare. "It was supposed to be a normal dosage."

Sam shrugged. "I may have upped it a little-"

Billy groaned. "Why are you such a little shi-"

"Out! Both of you!" May ordered. They looked at Coulson for orders but she yelled at them again and Coulson nodded. May ran a hand over her face with a groan and helped Grant out of the chair. "Come on, we're going to walk and talk, okay? Give him some water; he's not dying on our watch."

Everything after was a blur. May forced him to drink a bottle of water and kept him moving until finally he collapsed into a chair in the corner. He rested his cheek against the cool brick wall. "I want to sleep," he mumbled.

"Not yet-Skye. I need your help with Skye."

That perked him up. Grant blinked and forced himself to stay awake.

"I'll do anything for Skye."

May gave him a sad look, like she understood, and handed him a second bottle of water. "I need to know everything you may know about Dr. Seamus MacDougal. He was-is," she corrected, "a doctor who worked for Hydra around twenty-eight years ago, do you know of him?"

Grant scrunched his nose in disgust. "He's a bad man."

"This is ironic coming from a man who killed four agents, tried to kill three of his teammates, and kidnapped a woman he claims to love," May muttered as she glanced back at Coulson who was now pacing in the small room.

"No," Grant moaned, still trying to fight off the effects of the drug. "He's a bad, _bad_ man. I've done some bad things and I know John wasn't…uh…." Grant blinked. "What was I saying?"

Coulson pinched the bridge of his nose. "My God, Koenig's rendered him useless."

"Oh, right! John!

John didn't trust him," Grant said with a nod, remembering.

"He ran experiments back in the eighties. He created the machine John used on you, sir, and on Raina. It…I don't know, unlocks memories? And there was another, one that brainwashed individuals who needed an extra push." It all sounded so horrifying now that he could see everything with clarity.

May's face fell. "And?"

"He left Hydra because they weren't extreme enough for him. Their vision was more on world domination and he claimed he wanted to unlock the secrets to evolution so he helped found Project Centipede in the nineties after Cybertek failed to perfect the Deathlok program."

Grant took a sip of water and blinked a few times to clear his head. "After a few years John stopped trusting him, said he took things too far. His hobby was kidnapping gifteds so he could run experiments on them. He wanted to duplicate their powers and learn how to control them. He had a vision of creating a 'master race' of individuals with powers.

It was fucking terrifying."

Coulson froze and stared at him in horror and May turned a shade of green.

"What does this doctor have to do with Skye?" Something nagged at the back of his mind but he was too high to focus in on it. Doctor, Skye, her-Grant shot out of his chair, suddenly alert. "He can't go anywhere near her. Hydra is dangerous but he's on a whole different level; he will take Skye apart like a machine, open her up and play around until he twists her into a monster; an _actual_ monster."

His voice was high and he was close to hysterics at the thought of that man getting his hands on Skye.

"John told me once that the doctor was born with powers but they weren't as 'great' as he wanted them to be so he began trying to take them from others and when that didn't work he decided to use others with powers to his advantages by controlling them."

A wave of nausea washed through him and he had to take a seat before he fell to the ground. "The people we broke out of the Fridge…oh _God_." He buried his head in his hands. There was no undoing all of the terrible things he'd done, no matter how hard he tried.

"We've been working on rounding them up but Hydra has gotten to most of them."

Grant knew full well how Hydra operated. Those who didn't come willingly were brainwashed into submission or killed. He'd fucked up more than he'd realized.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered, knowing it didn't change anything but it didn't change the fact that he was.

He glanced up, the effects of the sodium pentothal wearing off. The pieces were beginning to fall into place. "MacDougal's her father, isn't he?" May's lips formed a fine line but he wasn't done with the questions. Everything made sense now, including her and Coulson's fight and why she was so concerned for Skye's well-being. "And you're her mother." He didn't know how, Raina…it didn't matter what she'd said; from the look on Coulson's face he knew he was right.

"We're done here," May replied coldly. Whatever concern she'd had for him was now gone; she was back to being the May he remembered. She left without a word and left him and Coulson alone.

"Sir-"

"Thank you for the information, it's…well, it explains a few things."

Grant opened his mouth but Coulson stopped him. "We need anything you can give us on Hydra. How they operate, secret channels, contacts, anything. We may even need you to infiltrate them if necessary; our past attempts have been mildly successful but not good enough. We have a few friends in the government who have been helping but we're still in hiding, we're not as effective as I'd like us to be and I'm hoping you can help with that. Hydra keeps poaching talent and gathering up those on the index. I'm done with this war, I want to destroy them; do you understand?"

Grant nodded.

"Good. Are you in, Grant? No one is forcing you to be here. All it would take is a few favors and you could be back in prison, serving time under your assumed name as if nothing had happened."

"But?" He knew full well something else was going on, he wasn't stupid.

"Your brother found you. I can't guarantee your safety if you return to prison." As if he cared about his own safety. "It was difficult to get you into the system the first time and to keep you moved around especially considering your family is so powerful. I don't think we can keep you off their radar this time."

Grant knew damn well how powerful his family was and they were an issue for another day. Right now he wanted to make things right, to keep the woman he loved safe; everything else could be shelved for another day.

"I'm here; you might as well put me to work. I'll do whatever I can to fix the damage I've caused."

Coulson nodded. "Good.

I'm not going to lie to you, Grant, you being here…" he sighed. "No one agrees with me and you hurt a lot of people. And the ones you didn't affect personally will be wary of you because of your ties to Hydra. It won't be easy but you've made a lot of progress and I think you can make more."

"Why? I mean…once you were over your initial anger you were willing to give me another chance, why?" That question had been in the back of his mind for over two years.

Coulson smiled. "I know a girl and when I met her-well, your ledger may be stained red but hers was bleeding with it when she was brought to me. Somehow she found a way to repair what she'd done, to live with her past, and to move on to do great things.

No one is hopeless, Grant, not even you. We all deserve a second chance. Every person is worth saving if they're willing to do the work and I think you are. Besides, I'm a sucker for a comeback story," he said with a shrug.

Grant glanced down at his lap with a nod, having no words. He didn't deserve Coulson's kindness but that was who Coulson was; the opposite of John.

"Oh, but Grant?"

He looked up to find Coulson near the door watching him. "I want to get one thing straight; if you hurt anyone on this team again, I will make sure you're locked away in the dirtiest hole I can find where you will spend your very long life suffering. And as a condition of your stay here you will personally apologize to everyone you hurt, including Agent Hand's team. Also, we will be monitoring your every move," he motioned to the table where a box sat.

Grant stood, already knowing what he'd find inside. He popped it open to find a silver ring version of the bracelet Skye had once been tagged with. So, they'd improved it.

"Let me guess, if I try to remove it-"

"A thousand units of detrotoxin will be injected into your bloodstream and when you wake up you'll be in one of the vaults downstairs."

He nodded and slipped it onto his finger. He hissed when a small needle poked him and then disappeared back into the band.

"Now you're tagged. Once I feel you're not a threat, you'll be free to come and go as you please."

"Thank you, sir, I…" he looked up to meet his eyes. "Thank you."

Coulson held the door open and led Grant into the hallway. "I'm afraid we're out of single bunks so you'll be sharing a room with Agent Hunter-"

"The commander of S.T.R.I.K.E., sir?"

"So, you've met?"

"No but I've heard of him, anyone who can tame Barton and Romanoff has my respect."

Coulson snorted. "You don't actually think those two ever followed his orders, do you?"

Okay, maybe not. That would explain why they had their own two-person S.T.R.I.K.E. team.

"No."

"Good. I'll show you to the common area and you can poke around if you'd like. It's past dinner time but feel free to stop by the kitchen and I'll have Agent Hunter track you down and show you to your room." Coulson stopped outside of a room where Grant could see a few familiar faces and his palms began to grow warm. He knew he had to do this but…shit, he wasn't sure he was ready.

Coulson headed inside but stopped and rounded back. "One final thing, Agent Ward," he whispered, placing a hand on his shoulder. He met his eyes and Grant was suddenly very afraid for his well-being. "I will destroy anyone who threatens my agents but I'm not just the director, I'm also a father, Skye's father, and if you break my baby girl's heart again I will personally make sure you regret every moment of your life, do you understand?"

Grant gave a vigorous nod. He and Skye had always been close but if she was May's daughter then he could only imagine how much closer they were now. "I will do my best to stay away, sir."

Coulson grinned. "I don't care what the two of you do, but if it ends in a way that destroys her…she's just managed to piece herself back together; I refuse to see her go through that again. Giving you a second chance is a far bigger deal than you realize, Grant. You may think you understand, but until it's your daughter suffering and you're forced to do nothing but watch because there's nothing you can do you can't even begin to understand."

"Sir-"

"Don't. I'm not your boss right now, I'm a pissed off father. Skye isn't the only one of my kids you hurt, Ward. Fitz, Simmons…they're all finally happy and if you do anything to ruin that I can't be held accountable for my actions, are we understood?"

It had never occurred to him that it would take them all this long to move on from his betrayal. Sure, he'd known it would rough and he had a lot of work to do but he was going to have to be on his guard at all times.

He gave Coulson another nod and Coulson sighed.

"Good, now go on, Agent Hunter's the one glowering and drinking beer and fair warning…he has his own reasons to hate you." _Wonderful_. "But he's usually too drunk to care. The kitchen's through the double doors. Try to get some rest; you've had a long day."

"Yes, sir."

Coulson walked past the common area and headed towards a staircase to where Grant assumed was his office. He was half-tempted to just turn, run, and find someplace to hide but he was sure his little tracker would prevent that so he took a long moment to brace himself. It wasn't like he'd be able to hide in his room all the time, especially when he had no idea where it was, so why not bite the bullet?

Once he was sure he could hold it together he took a few deep breaths and walked into the common room to find it was empty with the exception of his new roommate and three of the four people he wanted to see least; Skye, Trip, and Jemma. Okay, maybe he did want to see Skye; even if it hurt (he was a glutton for punishment). They all stopped their conversation once they caught sight of him. Skye shot him a look of pure hatred and he suddenly wished he'd followed Coulson and begged for a one night to be a coward.

Hunter looked him up and down in a way that even with all of his training Grant couldn't read. "Welcome to the Shatterdome, mate," the Brit greeted, tipping his beer in his direction with a smirk. He'd already had one arm around Skye and as his expression grew darker he pulled her closer, taking another swig. "So, you're the bloody bastard who killed Vic, eh?" Oh great, he really did have a good reason to hate him, lovely. Coulson really was trying to get him killed, wasn't he? "What a waste; she deserved to be taken out by someone better."

"I-" Grant began, unsure of how to do this. 'I'm sorry I killed your friend' didn't seem like a good enough opener, especially not in front of this many people.

Trip rolled his eyes. "Man, ignore that asshole," he said with a wave of his hand. He used his foot to pull up the chair near the sofa and motioned for Grant to take a seat. If Trip still held any sore feelings he was damn good at hiding them. "Want a beer? It's the shitty imported kind this one likes," he teased in Jemma's direction.

He forced himself to look at Jemma and was surprised to find that she wasn't angry, just sad. He'd never seen her so filled with despair. She shifted uncomfortably and averted her eyes.

Grant sighed, wondering if this was a mistake.

"Jemma-"

Jemma stood suddenly and reached for a bottle of water on the table. "Excuse me, I need to make sure Fitz takes his medication," she muttered before shoving past him.

He was so tempted to go after her, to apologize, but…

God, this was going to be harder than he thought.

"Don't, she'll be fine," Hunter whispered. "That one's just a bit emotional."

Skye scoffed and Grant could picture her rolling her eyes. His gaze shifted to Skye who was now glaring at Hunter who was too busy toying with her hair to notice or care. Grant watched them for another moment and noticed that Trip seemed far more interest in the beer in his hand than Skye. He'd been wrong before: she had moved on but not with Trip.

His bunkmate was her new boyfriend. Her new boyfriend whose friend he'd shot. Great; he'd always hated his fucking life, why should things change now?

Trip reached for a new beer and popped it open, holding it out for Grant. "I know this is weird but you need to get used to get used to being around people again eventually."

He had a point so Grant reluctantly took a seat in the armchair near Trip, waving off the beer. After being drugged alcohol was the last thing he needed. "I'm good, thanks," he muttered awkwardly.

"If you insist, more for me," Trip toasted happily as he took a swig.

He felt Hunter's eyes on him and when he met his gaze the older agent had a shit-eating grin on his face.

Grant didn't want to do this, not right now, but maybe he should just get it out of the way. "Look-"

"Tell me, love," Hunter said as he glanced down at Skye, "what was it about this one here? I don't see the appeal myself; I mean I'm much better looking. An upgrade you could say."

Trip snorted. "You have the ugliest mug I've ever seen. You're a downgrade; she can do better." Trip seemed to be speaking to both of them.

"Oh, like you?" Hunter asked, outraged.

Grant shifted uncomfortably. This was getting weird, maybe that was the point.

Trip smirked, winking in Skye's direction. "Don't be mad, Hunter, just because I'm the ultimate prize; the total package," he teased, leaning in to kiss Skye's cheek. She scowled and leaned away from him. "Come on, baby girl, you know I look good. I'm better looking than these two."

Skye scoffed in disgust and shoved Hunter's arm away from her. "I don't know why the two of you morons still insist on this game. You've both whipped them out, you know which one is bigger, why do you still want to one-up each other?"

"It's all in the name of love, sweetheart."

"Is that what you call it?" Trip muttered. "Because I call it not being over your ex-wife."

Skye stood, annoyed, and threw her hands up in the air. "You know, I try to be diplomatic about this but my God, Bobbi had the right idea divorcing your dumb ass," she yelled in Hunter's direction before rounding on Trip. "And you," she said, putting one finger in his face, "knew full well what you were getting into when you started sleeping with him so stop crying about it! If you want someone who is going to commit to you hen go find them! Stop wasting your time!"

"We were just teasing each-" Trip began but she hissed, sending him cowering against a cushion in fear.

"I don't care. He's only good for a few good thrusts unless your name happens to be Bobbi and you want babies and a house and all of that crap! So the two of you just stop fucking or stop bickering about it all the time because we're all sick of it!"

"Oy, you know full well it's more than a few-" Skye shot a glare in Hunter's direction and now it was his turn to be scared. "Fine, woman! You're a bloody menace, you know that?"

Skye huffed and reached for another beer which she downed in one long gulp.

Hunter nursed his beer and glanced in Grant's direction. "I knew having you here would piss her off, but man," he muttered with a shake of his head as he took a swig.

Skye's face went dark and the air in the room shifted. Things had been awkward before with Hunter trying to make it worse and Trip trying to control things but now it was Grant's turn to cower before her. He could see all of the anger and hurt and things she no doubt wanted to say to him but by the grace of God they were interrupted before she could begin to lay into him.

A high-pitched cry filled the air and Skye was on her feet so fast she was a blur. "Mommy!"

All of the air left his chest and he gripped the armrest so hard his knuckles went white. He watched as Skye scooped a tiny little girl, who didn't look old enough to be walking and talking, into her arms. Skye clutched her protectively as Hunter jumped up and put a hand on the little girl's back. Trip hung back, watching them with worry lining his features.

"Shh, baby, it's okay, I'm here." Skye said in a hushed whisper as she rocked her gently.

The little girl sobbed and hugged Skye tightly around the neck. "The monsters, mommy. So much blood-it was-" she sobbed loudly and Hunter moved his hand into her hair and leaned in to kiss the top of her head.

"It was just a dream," he insisted.

The funny thing about pain was that it always somehow managed to outdo itself. He thought he'd had a broken heart before, when Skye had learned the truth, but that was nothing compared to the emotion he felt right now.

The moment he'd realized Skye knew, that she hated him, back on the bus what felt like a lifetime ago, he thought his heart had broken. But that was nothing compared to this.

Because it wasn't Grant standing next to Skye and their daughter giving them comfort, it was Hunter. Hunter living the life he'd wanted. Maybe he didn't know the whole story but he could guess. His betrayal sent her into the arms of the first man she could find and Skye would never give up a child and Hunter seemed like an asshole on the surface but he clearly wasn't the type to walk away. It wasn't exactly like the happy ending he'd fantasized about with Skye but it didn't stop him from being jealous; he'd take this over not having her in his life at all.

Maybe that was love or maybe he was a lot more fucked up than he realized.

Skye held her tighter. "There's no monsters here, baby. You're safe, I promise. They're never going to hurt you again."

The little girl shook her head. "Daddy's the monster…he's…" she cried out loudly again and Skye tried to calm her by 'shushing' her quietly.

"No, baby, that's…that isn't your daddy, baby." She and Hunter shared a look and he looked to Trip for help but he had nothing. Skye kissed her daughter's temple, shaking her head. "Your daddy…sweetie your daddy's gone, remember? The man…that's mommy's daddy, he's the monster. Not yours, okay? I don't want you…" Skye looked completely frazzled.

"You're an angel, baby. Angels don't come from monsters," Hunter assured and the little girl nodded, still crying.

"Grandpa…my other grandpa…the bad one…he's the monster," she said slowly, as if to remind herself. "He's…he's not here?"

Hunter ran a finger over her cheek and shook his head. "No, baby and none of us will ever let him go near you again."

"Promise, Uncle Lance?"

He smiled and kissed her forehead. "I promise. No one's going to hurt my favorite princess."

"I'm your only princess."

"For now," he replied with a smirk.

Jemma appeared, looking harassed and frazzled. "I'm sorry, Skye. I peeked in to check on her after finding Fitz asleep and she just ran past me looking for you-"

Skye shook her head and kissed the toddler's temple. "Don't be, Jemma. She's fine right here. Aren't you?"

She nodded aggressively as Skye ran a hand through her hair. Skye gave her a soft smile but Grant could see the tension in her throat. She was fighting to hold it together.

Grant didn't understand what was going on but he recognized fear when he saw it. This wasn't the same kind he'd experienced as a child, this was different. Every person in this room clearly loved her and the Skye he knew would destroy anyone who hurt the people she loved so it had to be something really horrible for her to be this terrified.

"Alice, baby, was…" Skye met Hunter's eyes, her own filled with terror, and he gave her an encouraging nod like they'd been through this before. "Was this a nightmare? Like we talked about? Or were you…" she swallowed, as if she didn't want to know the answer. "Were they memories?"

Grant blinked in confusion. She was a baby, how could she-

His eyes moved to what he could see of her face and he really looked at her. He studied her for a long moment, trying to decipher her age. She seemed so small to him but it had been so long since he'd been around a child he admittedly had no clue about their development. She was walking and talking so she was probably at least a year and a half old and there was no way she was more than two and-

_Fuck_.

His heart began to race, pounding so loudly he was surprised when no one yelled at him to keep it down.

_Once is all it takes_.

It took him less than ten seconds to do the math. If she'd been born the January after his incarceration then that meant-

"No," he whispered in shock.

This…he felt…_broken_.

What had he done?

This wasn't how it was supposed to happen, he was supposed to be there, supposed to be better, and instead he'd missed out on everything, his child's entire life.

His…

Grant ran his hands over his face, his eyes never leaving that beautiful little angel in Skye's arms.

She was…

God, she was perfect.

The love he felt for Skye was nothing compared to what he was feeling now.

"Lance, take your niece, please," Skye whispered as she met Grant's gaze.

Hunter took her carefully as Skye handed her over. He held her against his chest protectively and she hid her face in the crook of his neck. "And your mommy thinks I'm only good for-" Skye's glare shut him up immediately. "I'm just trying to lighten the mood, love. And remember, you can't k-i-l-l him in front of the b-a-b-y."

Said baby was now clutching Lance's shirt and whimpering softly. He didn't care who had hurt her, he'd find them and destroy them. He'd lose his soul all over again if it meant protecting his daughter.

Though he wasn't sure anyone was going to get through Skye. She stood across from him with her arms crossed and stared down at him like a protective mother. That was it, the change he'd noticed. She wasn't just Skye anymore, she was someone's mom.

How was it possible to fall in love with her all over again?

He didn't know he could love her any more than he already did but here they were.

He was screwed.

"She's mine," Skye said evenly. "_Only_ mine. I don't care what you think you know or what's running through that head of yours but if you come anywhere near her I will kill you. And it will be a slow, painful death. Do you understand?"

"Skye, I would never hurt-"

"Do you understand?"

He didn't blame her for wanting to keep him out of her life but wasn't this why he was here? He realized now the only reason they would resort to breaking him out of prison was for the baby. The team was a family and they would die for one another and if dealing with him being back meant keeping one of their own safe…

"Yes, but I swear to you, Skye, I will do anything in my power to keep her safe."

Alice raised her head from Hunter's chest slowly and turned to stare at Grant. He'd seen and experienced traumatic things, horrible things, things of nightmares, but he had never in his life been more terrified than he was in this moment.

She blinked at him curiously and then glanced towards her mother for a brief moment before meeting his eyes. "I know you."

_Yes, you do_ he wanted to say but he kept his mouth shut. He didn't know what she'd been told.

_Daddy's a monster._

He shook off the thought; no matter how much Skye hated him she'd never tell their child that version of their story.

"No you don't, baby. Just ignore hi-"

"You're the reason mommy's sad," she said quietly, breaking his heart. Skye turned her head and he could sense the little girl wasn't lying. His heart clenched; did she still love him? Could he be that lucky? "Mommy's sad a lot. It's usually because of you."

How did he respond to that?

He met Skye's eyes and they were filled with pain and guilt and fear.

"Skye, I'm sorry," he whispered. He couldn't begin to imagine what she'd gone through and in this case it really was completely his fault.

"Hey, baby girl, look what I brought you," Trip called out, breaking through the tension like a ray a light.

Alice turned in surprise. The moment she realized Trip had been there all along she threw herself into his arms happily. "Uncle Trip! You're home!"

"Of course I am," he responded with a chuckle as he hugged her tightly. "Did you really think I'd miss your big birthday bash? It's not every day your favorite girl turns two."

Grant's heart fell. She was turning…that meant…

"She's not-"

"No," Skye interrupted crossly. "I told you; you know _nothing_."

"I…" he furrowed his brows in confusion. He really had no clue what he'd missed out on. Alice was too old to be theirs but she looked so much like a miniature-version of Skye. Did this mean she was already pregnant when they…

It didn't matter because it suddenly hit him that he wasn't a father. He'd just discovered she existed minutes ago and he was devastated that this wouldn't be his life. He'd been so ready to take on this responsibility, to be there for Skye, even if it was just to watch out for them both. He just wanted what was best for them.

Grant understood Coulson a bit better now. If this was how he felt over a girl he didn't know he couldn't imagine what Coulson had gone through after what he'd done to the team. He deserved to be back in that cell not having a second chance at life. It was stupid to think he could have it all.

Even so, he was completely in love with that little girl. She was a part of Skye; he'd do anything to keep them both safe. Hell, to keep this team safe. Even though he'd hurt them they were still his family, he had just realized it too late and he was going to do everything in his power to make up for that. He didn't deserve to be happy but they did and he was going to make damn sure they were.

Alice's giggle pulled him back to reality. "Look, Uncle Lance!" Alice held out a stuffed monkey happily, all evidence of her earlier breakdown gone. That was kids for you, they were resilient as hell and with a mother like Skye and May for a grandmother this one had to be as tough as nails.

Hunter smiled and he and Trip exchanged a look that made Grant feel like an idiot for believing either one of them had been involved with Skye. He missed the days when Skye had looked at him that way.

Grant sighed; wow was he was pathetic.

Skye moved to her knees and held out her arms for Alice. "Come on, baby. Auntie Jemma wants to take you to the lab to make sure you're okay and then I'll put you back to bed."

Alice shook her head and clutched Trip around the neck. "No, I don't wanna."

"Skye, perhaps we can do it in the morning? After she's rested," Jemma suggested.

"I want Uncle Trip to tuck me in. I like his stories and he does the voices better than you do, mommy."

Skye smiled and reached out to touch her cheek. "All right, pumpkin."

"Can Uncle Lance come too? He knows where to check for the monsters."

The light left Skye's eyes but she nodded. Alice smiled and kissed Skye's cheek before wrapping her arms around Trip again. Skye stood and moved to Jemma, apprehensive. Alice leaned into Trip's ear to whisper 'mommy is sad again' to which he replied 'I know, baby'.

Grant rubbed his chest, above where his heart was. He couldn't stand to see Skye in pain. He wanted to do something to comfort her but all he could do was sit in his chair numbly and be as useless as he felt.

The moment Alice was gone Skye began pacing. "You told me it would stop-"

"Skye, I told you that the medication could help but we don't even know why-"

"She is a baby, Jemma!" Skye yelled, now in her face. "I can't even remember any of this; I was too young, how…" Skye was in tears and she backed away, close to falling apart.

Jemma frowned and her fingers twitched. She reached out before pulling back quickly, seemingly deciding Skye didn't need that sort of consoling. "Those memories exist, Skye, even if you can't access them. And we don't know what that machine did to her. None of this is your fault, Skye. It's _his_."

"I'm supposed to keep her safe, Jem. _Me_. How can I do that when she has access to my memories?! I don't know what happened in China and I don't want to know and it kills me that she has to live that every time she closes her eyes! And it is my fault! They're my memories, not hers!"

"Skye, you need to calm-"

"No! You find a way to fix this!"

"It's not like turning off a light, Skye! Science can't explain why some people are born with gifts and we don't even know the full scope of what she can do and until we completely understand it we can't try to diagnose it and it's not a disease, Skye. She had abilities and she's a child, she can't control them."

Skye wiped at her eyes. "This is too much. She's been through too much. She's only two, Jemma. This isn't fair. I just…I promised to keep her safe. It's my job to protect her. How am I supposed to do that when I'm the one she needs protecting from?"

"Skye, please-"

Skye seemed to realize he was still there and she sniffled angrily. "The next time you see your friend Raina be sure to let her know that machine of yours works wonders," she spat before storming out of the room.

His…

The memory…

"Skye, wait!" Grant jumped out of his seat and went after her without thinking. He needed to tell her everything, so she could understand. He wanted to fix this.

Jemma caught him by the arm. "Don't. Please. It'll just…" he met her eyes and she was close to tears as well. "I know the machine was Garrett's and everything that's happened since you've been incarcerated has nothing to do with you but she needs someone to blame right now."

"The doctor…Skye's father…he found them, didn't he?"

She nodded and he had to take a seat.

He knew it wasn't his fault but he still felt responsible. If he'd opened his eyes sooner, if he'd been here to keep them safe…there were a million things he could have done differently. He buried his face in his hands, wrecked with guilt. He didn't even noticed Jemma leave but when she returned he took notice.

"Here, I figured you'd be hungry," she said as she offered up a sandwich. It was even made the way he liked it. He didn't think she'd ever paid that much attention to him when they were living on the bus.

Grant took is gratefully, confused. She had no reason to be this kind to him. "Thank you."

Jemma stood before him with her arms crossed. "I need to speak and I need you to not interrupt."

"Okay." He owed her much more than that.

"I want to forgive you, not for you, for me. It's not healthy to hold onto anger. But I can't. Every day I have to live with what you did to me and to Fitz. I can't forgive you and I may never trust you again but I can't waste energy hating you.

You have no idea what we've been through. Fitz's recovery alone…" She wiped at her eyes angrily. "He was going to die for me down there. And I couldn't let him and because of that he's not the same. His recovery was long and hard and even with the best doctors in the world he's not the same."

She closed her eyes with a sigh. "I don't have the energy," she whispered. She opened her eyes a moment later and met his sadly.

"I just want to be happy and we are _finally_ happy. And I don't want you being here to change that so…I will try to find a way to forgive you and until then I'm going to just live with the fact that you're here.

Because as much as I hate to admit it; we need you. What you saw? That was _nothing_. Skye's life is a horror show. What her father did to her and to that little girl…he's a monster and he needs to be stopped. And if you can help us do that…I may be willing to forgive what you did to me.

But…I'm sorry, Ward, I can never forgive what you did to Fitz."

When Grant moved to his feet and pulled Jemma into his arms he didn't expect her to lean in and begin sobbing. He'd simply been acting on impulse. When someone you cared about was in this much pain you had to do something to try to make it better.

He held her awkwardly while she cried.

"What…Jemma, what was that?" Even if that wasn't his daughter he still cared. He loved Skye and she was a part of her and he couldn't help but want to protect her. She was an innocent child, she needed to be protected. Children deserved to be loved and kept safe. Grant knew what happened when they weren't and he wouldn't wish that on anyone.

Jemma pulled away and used her sleeves to wipe her eyes.

"He…I don't know, I think he thought if he could force Skye to relive the massacre it would…break her? Get her to stay with him? I don't know. I just know when we found her…" she looked down, unable to go on.

"I'm sorry I aske-"

"No." She looked up and met his eyes. "You need to know. Alice has gifts. She can…I don't know if it's mind-reading…but she knows things. Skye doesn't remember but somehow that machine did unlock some things because a few months ago Alice just started rambling about the monster that was going to kill them. She knows things, things…sometimes she just has nightmares, like children do, but most of the time she's reliving what Skye went through as a baby and what…and what he..." Jemma covered her mouth, unable to keep speaking.

Grant felt his face pale. He knew what had happened and to think of anyone having to live that let alone relive it…and for a child to have to see that…

Jemma wiped her eyes again as more tears fell. "He tortured both of them. She was just a baby and..." She blew her nose into her sleeve and shook her head, still crying.

"Oh God."

What kind of monster…

Grant wanted to punch a wall.

"I don't know how to fix her. I don't think she needs to be fixed but…just…stay away from her. Not because I think you'd hurt her, but you have to understand she can't control her powers and-"

"You're afraid of what she might see, right? That she'll unlock some of my memories?"

"I'm sorry. Coulson…he told me about your family and that with what I'm sure you've done in your life-she's suffering enough." He nodded and she sniffled. "Good. Now eat your sandwich, you're too damn skinny."

A smile played on his lips. "Okay, mom."

They sat in silence while he ate his sandwich. When he finished he was sure he finally had the nerve to speak to her. "Jemma, about what I did-"

"You don't-"

"No, I do."

He waited until she was looking at him to continue. "I know it doesn't excuse anything but I swear I was trying to give you both a chance. If I hadn't…Garrett would have ordered someone else to take the shot. I couldn't…I couldn't do it and I thought at least you'd have a chance to find a way out, like you always do. I didn't think it would sink…and even then, I know it doesn't erase the trauma…I'm sorry, Jemma.

It doesn't fix anything but I am. And I've had time to come to terms with what I've done and why and I just want to make up for it all. I want to be my own man and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make this up to you. And to Fitz. And to everyone else."

"Oh, Ward-"

"My darling Jemma, your best friend is pacing in your lab, perhaps you should go attend to her?"

Jemma glanced up to find Hunter in the door with a bottle of Scotch in one hand and two glasses in the other. She gave Grant's hand a squeeze before standing. "Of course. How is-"

"Asleep. The wanker's with her, so if she wakes she won't be alone. And I checked in on your little monkey, he's sleeping soundly."

Jemma smiled and kissed his cheek. "Thank you."

"No problem, just try to keep it down the next time the two of you have crazy monkey sex, yes?"

She rolled her eyes and Grant found himself smiling into his glass of juice. _Good job, Fitz_.

"Whatever, I could say the same about you. I'm not sure who you're louder with; Trip or Bobbi. Maybe I should conduct an ex-"

"Bye, Simmons."

She chuckled and disappeared into the hallway.

Grant reached for his plate to wash up but Hunter stopped him. "Stay roomie; have a drink."

"I shouldn't-"

"It's fifty-year-old Scotch, mate. You don't have to get wasted, just take a taste," he insisted as he took a seat next to Grant and poured them each a glass (his own much fuller than Grant's).

Grant took is hesitantly, he hadn't touched alcohol in years and with the drugs still in his system he wasn't sure this was a good idea but on the other hand…he'd had one fucked up day. "Cheers," he muttered, tipping his glass before taking a small gulp. It burned more than he expected but it was smooth and just what he needed right now. "Thanks."

Hunter shrugged. "Not a problem."

"Look, about Victoria-"

"I get it, mate. You had orders. I'm not exactly innocent myself. S.A.S., S.H.I.E.L.D., S.T.R.I.K.E.; I've taken my share of lives. I loved Victoria, she was my family, but I'm not going to try to kill your or anything. Coulson trust you; that's all I need to know. He says you're hell-bent on changing and redemption and shite; good for you."

Grant wasn't sure if Hunter was just drunk or if he was being genuine but he wasn't going to leave it there. "Well, I'm sorry all the same. She didn't deserve that and…" he sighed. "I was taking orders from a monster." They all had their own monsters it seemed. "I should have known better."

"Apology accepted but I need to warn you, mate, it's Izzy you need to watch out for." Hunter told him with a frown.

"Izzy?"

"Hartley. Victoria's wife-well, widow now."

Grant closed his eyes.

_Fuck._

"See, this is why I like you. You feel remorse, I can tell. Do you know how many of those fucks under my command were really Hydra? How many of them enjoyed the kill? I've never taken a life lightly and it should stay with you. But some of those bastards…" Hunter shook his head and took another swig. "It'll feel good putting them in prison."

Well, Hunter certainly had a way with people because Grant was smiling. "It will feel good to do a lot of things," he admitted.

"Like sleep? You look like you can use it. After this round I'll give you a quick tour and then show you to our room. Though, I feel I should warn you: Fitz and Simmons-"

"Are loud I take it?"

"Like animals. I don't know what the bloody fuck he's doing to her in there but she's always screaming for him to do it harder when it's clear he's already doing it pretty hard."

Grant smirked. He was glad they were happy. It was about time. "I'll be sure to get some ear plugs."

Hunter chuckled. "Fair enough. But do me a favor? The next time you want to get your friends together, maybe just lock them in a closet instead."

Was he…the smirk on Hunter's face said he was smirking but Grant couldn't laugh, not about that.

"How bad is he?"

"It's better than before. He had trouble processing speech for a long time but most of the time he's fine. Every once in a while he has trouble verbalizing his thoughts but Mack and Simmons are usually there to help him.

But hey, he got the girl, that's something."

"Yeah, I guess."

"He's better off than we are in that department."

Grant nearly choked mid-drink and blinked at Hunter. "What?"

"I'm not blind, mate. You're in love with Skye. Can't say I blame you; she is one hell of a woman. I don't know anyone else who can do what she's done and after what she's been through. She's selfless, that one. "

"She's amazing," Grant admitted, knowing he would love her until the day she died. "And Alice, she's…she's a lot like Skye, isn't she?"

_What do you want?_ His therapists had asked him over and over again. He knew now: he wanted to be with her; to have a family, a _real_ family, people he could protect and love.

She was all he wanted, her and that little girl and he was too late.

He'd broken them and now it was too late.

Hunter smirked. "She's everything, mate. I had no idea when I met that tiny thing that you could love a little person like that. She has everyone around here wrapped around her wee finger."

Grant could see him holding something back and he felt comfortable enough to pry. "What?"

Hunter shrugged. "It just seems…ridiculous now. I had found the one and I lost her because she was ready for a family and I was so convinced I'd be a terrible father and now…well, I know it's not the same, being an uncle, but now I regret it. I had a beautiful, smart woman who is one of the best damn agents I've ever met and for some reason she wanted me and I let that go because I was too damn stubborn to even consider giving her what she wanted."

"But now you have Triplett-"

Hunter scoffed. "It's not the same. I…I wish I could commit to him, I do. But…when you find _the one_ no one else compares, mate, and it's not fair to the next person who comes along. He'll find someone else, someone better. Until then we're just keeping each other busy is all. He knows that."

Grant toyed with his glass, unsure of what to say. "That's tough," he said finally, sick of the word 'sorry' already.

Hunter clapped him on the back and Grant winced. He'd been adverse to touch before but he'd gone so long without it and he didn't know Hunter that well…he really needed to work on that issue.

"Look, Ward, I feel bad for you. I understand what you're feeling, loving a woman who despises you. But…don't give up on her, mate, not if you really love her."

"Hunter-"

"Call me 'Lance'."

"All right-Lance, Skye loathes me and she has every reason to. I'm not going to ruin her life by selfishly pursuing her. She deserves to be happy. Besides, she can do better for her and for that little girl."

Lance gave him a look Grant couldn't decipher before leaning in close. "Look, if you tell her I said this I will kill you, understood? I love her, I do, but I am terrified of her. She's Melinda May's daughter, she's fucking terrifying when you mess with her. And then there's May to deal with and I am not getting on their bad side."

Grant stared back at him with an expression that told him to continue.

"Fine, look…that woman has never stopped loving you. Hell, I know for a fact she loves you. She hates herself for it, don't get me wrong, but she does all the same. And the way I see it, if two people love each other, it doesn't matter what's getting in their way they should try to work through their bullshit and be together."

"Wow," Grant whispered. "I'm rooming with a fucking guy who's going to make me watch romantic comedies, aren't I?"

Lance stared at him for a long moment before laughing. "Look at you, making jokes."

Grant shrugged, it had to happen eventually.

"I'm serious, you should fight for her. You'll regret it if you don't and she's not going to move on, if she was she would have done it by now but she's not interested in it.

Though, I can't blame her. She has enough to deal with, being an agent, keeping Alice safe, and after what their father did to them I'm surprised her sanity's still intact."

Grant chuckled. "Yeah, well, Skye is resilient as-wait, what do you mean 'their father'?"

Lance lowered his glass and watched Grant in confusion before making an 'o' face. "Right, you don't know." He set his glass down and poured himself a refill. "A few months after Coulson convinced me to join his little effort to revive S.H.I.E.L.D. she was taken. We searched for weeks and when we finally caught a break and found her…" Lance stared down into his glass, a dark expression on his face. Once he was done reliving the memory he downed his entire glass and met Grant's eyes. "When we found her she was…I've seen some shit, Grant, but this was…he'd spent weeks torturing her, trying to brainwash her. I don't know how she survived it.

And when pulled her out she was raving, like a lunatic, and it wasn't until Triplett found the baby that we understood why.

He'd decided he needed a re-do and like he had done with Skye as a baby he was-"

"Experimenting on her."

Lance nodded. "Coulson tried to find her a good home but Skye-she couldn't do that to her little sister, mate. She couldn't put her through what she'd been through. So we all agreed to keep her here and Skye's been raising her ever since.

But she…she's starting to realize it's a lie. Skye didn't want her to know her origins, said no child should have to live with that pain. Told her that her father was a hero who died defending S.H.I.E.L.D. and it was a good lie, until her powers kicked in. I don't know how they work, but she and Skye have a connection. Maybe it's because of their father or because of something he did to them but Alice is connected to her mind. She knows far more than a child her age should know and she's smart; the smarted kid I've ever met. Simmons thinks it's because she can tap into the human mind, but we don't know. We can't know, not without putting her through hell again."

He shook his head and poured another drink. Grant held out his glass, needing another as well.

"I feel sorry for the poor son-of-a-bitch who tries to hurt that kid, she will destroy them and if she fails there's a whole line of people waiting to do it."

Grant downed his drink and let out a shaking breath. "I'll get there first," he muttered angrily. Skye would hate him for it but at least her hands would be clean.

He'd failed to protect his own siblings and Skye was selflessly spending her life raising hers as if she were own child.

She was everything he could never be.

"That's the look, right there. You're so bloody in love with her, mate. I almost feel sorry for you."

"Yeah? I feel sorry for me, too."

Lance laughed and stood to collect their mess. "Come on, mate, I promised Coulson you'd get some rest tonight. Tomorrow's going to be another big day and the one after that and well, you get it. That's how it works here, we don't get much downtime."

"And how is that different from before?"

"It's not, but at least we get this dorm-like bonding now."

Grant shook his head and followed Lance to the kitchen where he washed their dishes, not wanting to give anyone a reason to hate him even more. After a short tour Lance let him down the hall towards their room.

"Your things are already here and we have our own bathroom, it's small, but it's something. I'll leave you alone for a few, let youngest settled in."

"Thanks," Grant said, grateful. He moved to close the door behind Hunter and watched as he knocked, then entered what he assumed was Trip's room. He shook his head, feeling bad for Trip. He knew what it was like to be used to forget someone else.

He began closing the door when the door across from them opened and a startled Skye appeared. He could see past her, to where a tiny form slept on one of the twin beds. When he met her eyes she continued to stare at him, a range of emotions playing on her face.

Grant wanted to say something, anything, but instead he gave her a small nod and closed the door. The moment it clicked he leaned against it, his hands shaking.

He'd meant what he'd said; he was going to keep his distance as much as possible. It would break his heart but it was the least he could do for her. He just hadn't realized they'd be living so close to one another.

This was going to be a lot harder than he'd anticipated.


End file.
